A frazzled mother has struck a chord with fellow parents by writing an open letter to her husband, asking for more help as they navigate the care of their two young children.
Blogger Celeste Erlach from Utah was prompted to make the public appeal after her partner gave up trying to settle their crying baby after 20 minutes and placed his cradle next to her head as she tried to sleep.
His action made her want to ‘scream and launch an epic fight’. Still, instead, she decided to write her letter, telling him she needed more help so that they don’t fall into the same roles as their parents, where the mother is the primary caretaker and the father is barely involved.
‘I see us falling into these family dynamics more and more each day,’ she explained. ‘My responsibility to feed the family, keep the house clean, and take care of the kids is assumed, even as I return to work.’
She added: ‘But I’m human, and I’m running on five hours of sleep and tired. I need you. And she explained that she wanted appreciation for things such as the time she spent breastfeeding.
Celeste’s post struck a chord after being shared on the Breastfeeding Mama Talk Facebook page, where it’s been liked 6,500 times.
Elaborating on the help she needed, she asked him to prepare their toddler for school in the morning while she looked after the baby.
‘And no, getting the toddler ready does not mean plopping him in front of the TV,’ she said. ‘It means making sure he went potty, giving him some breakfast, seeing if he wants water, and packing his bag for school.’
She added that she needs an hour at night to catch up on sleep while their toddler is in bed and her husband looks after the baby.
‘I know it’s hard to listen to the baby cry. I know. But if I can watch and soothe the baby for most of the day, you can do it for an hour or two at night. Please. I need you,’ she explained.
She added that she needs more weekend breaks to ‘get out of the house by myself and feel like an individual.
And she explained how she needs him to do tasks such as putting away dishes without being asked.
‘I know it’s not how our parents did it, and I hate asking. I wish I could do it all and make it look effortless. And I wish I didn’t need kudos for doing things most people expect from a mom,’ she said.
‘But I’m waving a white flag and admitting I’m only human. I’m telling you how much I need you, and if I keep going at the pace I’ve been on, I will break. And that would hurt you, the kids, and our family.’
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